I decided to use this platform to
write on this salient issue that has been neglected by most parents in our
contemporary society. Recently, I attended one of the lectures with the topic
“Challenges of Family Catechesis” in the ongoing catechetical week in most
Catholic Churches in the eastern part of our country and that prompted me to
put up this article. The family as we know is the smallest unit of the society.
It is the first point of contact for the child where he/she learns the basic
societal, cultural, ethnic, religious and social values. The family is the
first Christian community in which a child first experiences faith and love. It
is also a domestic church for sharing the faith with parents as the primary
educators of faith. Let me brief you on
what family catechesis means.
According to the Catechism of the
Catholic Church, prologue, paragraph 5, page 28: “Catechesis is an education in the faith of Children, young people and
adults which includes especially the teaching of Christian doctrine imparted ,
generally speaking, in an organic and systematic way, with a view of initiating
the hearers into the fullness of Christian life.” It aims at presenting an
organic synthesis of the essential and fundamental contents of the Catholic
doctrine as regards both faith and morals to the hearers. The primary catechist
for children is their parents. To catechize is to give instructions, to educate
someone. Again, catechesis is built on four pillars: “The baptismal profession
of faith (the creed), the sacraments of faith, the life of faith (the
Commandments) and the prayer of the believer i.e. the Lord’s Prayer, (CCC;
Prologue, paragraph 13, page 29). Family catechesis is a religious education
program in which parents fully participate in the faith formation of their
children. Parents are the primary teachers of faith. When a child is baptized,
the parents in conjunction with the godparent of the child take full
responsibility to bring up the child in the practice of the catholic faith. Through
the ministry of Family catechesis, the church seeks to facilitate the process
of ongoing faith development that happens formally and informally within the family.
But then, my question is: “How many parents in our today’s world are involved
in family catechesis?” Being a parent is one thing and training your children
according to the faith and doctrines of the Catholic Church is a herculean
task. Each parent has a singular responsibility to inculcate Catholic morals
and virtues in their Children.
Going down the memory lane, I
remember vividly when I was much younger and how my lovely mum contributed
immensely in nurturing and inculcating the catholic faith in me and my
siblings. At a very young age of seven,
I had already begun catechism class and was an ardent member of the Block
Rosary crusade. Then, my mum left no stone unturned when it comes to family
catechesis and even up till now, the fire of faith still burns in the family.
Then, she never joked with our family prayers. At least, we recited the rosary
each day and after the rosary, she would instruct us more about the catholic
faith. For me, I got my spirituality from her. She was an ardent legionary and
also a member of so many pious societies of which she made sure we joined them.
Unlike most kids that spent more of their time on television, such never
happened during my early days. At a point, mum would ban and even disconnect
the TV cable (those days of Binatone antenna) just to prevent us from watching
the television. We could only get access to it whenever she was around. Then,
we had so many religious books and religious movies in our home. Each time we
didn’t receive Holy Communion at mass, she will make sure we received the
sacrament of reconciliation as soon as possible. We have a family altar where
we gather each morning for prayers and also to share the word of God. Once in a
while, she will invite a Catholic Priest to come and admonish and pray for the
family. Same goes with my Dad, he equally made sure he contributed his own
quota in making sure we learnt the catholic faith. Sometimes, I wonder what
would have been my fate with regards to spirituality if not for my parents.
Often times, mum would always tell us how she began and how she knew the
catholic faith through her parents and through Block rosary crusade. The advent
of mobile technologies has changed our lifestyle positively and negatively.
Today, most families don’t even
know what family catechesis is all about. Some don’t even pray together or share
the word of God together. In most cases the parents are so preoccupied with the
jobs that they have little or no time to catechize their children and yet you
expect the child to uphold the catholic faith. Most of the societal problems we
are facing results from improper child upbringing and parental laxity. Often
times, when married men and women comes to the altar of God to say the prayers
of the faithful during Eucharistic celebration, the way and manner which they
say the prayer makes one to wonder if such a person is truly a catholic. One
spectacular thing about the Catholic Church is that we have procedures for
doing this. A situation whereby the parents cannot pray, what then will be the
faith of the child? How many families can boast of a family altar? How many
families say their prayers together? Block rosary centers no longer exist in
our today’s world unlike before. I still doff my cap for Onitsha Archdiocese,
up till today, Block rosary crusades is still waxing stronger over there. At
least, in a street you can count up to five block rosary centers. Most youths
cannot say the litany of the Blessed Virgin Mary accurately or say the rosary
well but yet such person grew up in a Catholic home. To an extent, mobile
technologies have instilled laziness in us. In most families, both the parent
and the children are always busy with their smartphones or watching television
programs. There is no effective communication between parents and children. Most
youths no longer value the importance of the sacraments especially the
sacrament of reconciliation. I had a faith discussion with one of my friend and
he out rightly told me that since after his first holy communion, he can’t
remember ever visiting the confessional. I couldn’t believe my ears! Most
youths also falls in this category. Some year ago, I attended a wedding
ceremony of a catholic couple and to my greatest shock; the bridegroom didn’t
receive Communion on his wedding day (I don’t actually know his reasons for
that). How then will you expect such a person to tell his children the
importance of receiving Holy Communion when he don’t even have regards for it. Every
parent has a role to play in family catechesis. Often times, when you attend Church programs,
you tend to see more of the married men and women and the elderly than the
youths. What is actually the problem? Where did we get it wrong?
The youths are the hope of the
Catholic Church in this perilous time and age. This is a clarion call not only
to our parents but also to the youths of this generation because tomorrow you
will get married and be in a position to catechize your children. You can’t
give what you don’t have. What will you tell your children? How will you
fulfill your primary obligations if you’re knowledgeable about the faith of the
church? I think we need to go back to the drawing board before it becomes late.
We need to learn our Catholic faith from the scratch and also uphold the true
doctrines of the church. The church is built on sacred scriptures and sacred traditions.
The sole reason why most youths leave the Catholic Church in pursuit of the
“TRUTH” is because they lacked proper family catechesis. Whatever you can’t
find in the Catholic Church, I wonder where you can find such (I stand to be
corrected). Ladies are usually victims of such. Most times, I frown at Catholic
ladies when they make this statement “My pastor advised me to …” we are not
practicing a mediocre religion. To the best of my knowledge, every Catholic is
meant to have a spiritual director who might be a Priest or a Religious. Why
don’t you approach a Priest for proper counseling when the need arise. Nobody
is perfect. Sometime ago, I had a little problem with my faith, all I did was
to confine in a priest and his words of advice brought me back on track. A
priest acts as a mediator between us and God. Again, there are so many good
books and movies on the faith of the church, what stops you from making use of
them.
In conclusion, parents should
learn to appreciate the gift of child upbringing. Children are free gift from
God. You never bargained or never paid for them. So, God through the ministry
of the Church has entrusted them into your care. Learn to love your kids
irrespective of their stubborn behavior. Teach them the Catholic faith, be role
models to them, send them to block rosary and even Children’s mass where they
will be further tutored. The only way to save the Church is by giving your kids
proper family catechesis. Say your morning and night prayers together as one
family. Share the word of God together, in that way you learn from each other.
The mother has a very big role to play in family catechesis. Let this words be
your watchword “Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old,
he will not depart from it (cf: Prov. 22:6). Instead of watching “African
Magic” with your kids, why not expose them to catholic channels like “Eternal
World Television Network, EWTN” and some other religious movies. Always take
your kids to Sunday masses and if possible weekday masses. Send them to mission
schools; teach how to say the rosary and other catholic prayers. Explain to
them the importance of the sacraments especially the sacrament of the Eucharist
and the sacrament of reconciliation. Make sure they join pious societies like
Legion of Mary, Sacred Heart society, Catholic Bible Society of Nigerian etc.
Always learn to pray for your kids, don’t curse them when they err rather show
them love. Have a family priest and make sure he visits the family once in a
while for prayers and counseling. As you do this, you will find out that your
child will never depart from it even when he grows old.
Finally, Let us implore the intercession
of our Blessed Mother Mary to continually intercede for all broken families and
all parents that have neglected their duty that through her powerful
intercession, more families will be united in love and the faith of the church
will inculcated in the younger generations through adequate and proper family catechesis.
Shalom!
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